| The Evolution of Parenting |
| First time parents | Seasoned parents | |
| Food | Organic baby food in a jar from the health food store | Mashed hotdogs and brown marked down bananas |
| Feeding method | Spoon at a time with babys own silver spoon | Pour into kid with a funnel |
| Diapers | New Zealans cloth diapers | Whatever's on sale (except Luvs) |
| Restraint | German swing chair | Staple sleeper to floor |
| Hygene | Baby wipes with lanolin | Paper towels and Windex |
| Entertainment | Being read to | Barney videotapes |
| Transport | Car seat | Cat carrier in trunk |